Plecostomus

Some say you're a sucker boy
Just because like a rubbery toy
You stick to glass with a kissy face noise
Well, what's wrong with a little lip suction

Stick to glass, that's what you do
Because you lick the algae off too
Because the gravel's got a lot of fish poo
Well, who wants a mouthful of awful fish messed on

Did I see you on the submarine
Clinging like the fish with an admiral dream
Bet you're licking it fine
Keeping it clean
They may call you, this, the suckiest of suckers
Plecostomus
And fish uvulas
Yeah, the're all…

Suck now, that kissy noise
Suck now, that kissy noise
Sink to the gravel and yech to the awful

Did I see you on the submarine
Clinging like a fish with the wrangler dream
Oh, have you seen fish food flakes today
Once you see us
Won't you feed us
Feed your fish

So we swam that tank again
Round the seventh lap you said you never find flakes
"I never find flakes, won't you feed me again?"
I need a bit of bladder gas to free the floatation

It was done, I felt my bubbles burst
It was the splashy fish, found fish food first
You're a greedy loach, and you're at your worst
I swam to the sub praying for a bite of the crumbs

Did I see you on the submarine
Clinging like a fish with the Dyson dream
But you're licking to shine
What do you mean?
See the algae scum you're seeking is already clean
You've already been and it's already clean
They may call you, yes, the suckiest of suckers
Plecostomus
Fish uvulas look like this

Ahh lala ahh, la lala ahh, la la lala, aah lala la, the uvula

So Cossy, if you ever meet mystics
They're never all about the tartar on fish sticks
Why pick a pickle sauce when your mystic robe itches
Weigh in your waist, be grateful I ate all the flakes

Some say you're a sucker boy
Just because of your kissy face noise
You are the fish, the fish with the poise
I make this bubble and think of you fondly
Did I see you on the submarine
Clinging like a fish with the krakken dream
To the core of the vessel
Like the owl in a tree
Counting licks to the fine
Center chewy
But its a toy in the tank
It's not a sub in the sea
And face to the glass
You suck the algae
See me flipping out the smartphone
And making it big, yeah I'm making it big

Zoom zoom zoom zoom zoom zoom zoom zoom zoom

Yeah, I'm making it big
That dangly thing
They may call you, yes, the suckiest of suckers
Plecostomus
Fish uvulas
Look like this

The Great Spoonbender

Oh yes, I'm the great spoonbender
I'm bending utensils for fun
They twist and they twine
Its with only my mind
You know I'm the talented one

Oh yes, I'm the great spoonbender
Turned down by the super heroes
I've a claim for the fame
But to my real shame
The X-Men still haven't phoned

Revealed is a feeling to shake the grief
You'll hear metal squeal
Oh, this tormented steel

Yes, I'm the great spoonbender
Just flattening things that were round
Your spoon's drooping
Take that Wolverine
Your soup is untouchable now
I'm bending the spoons all around

Revealed is a feeling to shake the grief
You'll hear metal squeal
Oh, this tormented steel

Yes, I'm the great spoonbender
Just flattening things that were round
Utensils need much more droopening
You supers are so soupless now
I'm bending the spoons of this town

The Han Soliloquy

I'm not a fighter pilot
Some death star station target's not a bold attack
Its more like idiotic
Falcon to fly, why be tied in that
And a faster laser blaster gets by
More times than jedi tricks
Picking thick trash mash grime
Inside my stinking my vest

And the wookie standing by my side says,
A worra roroar

Don't wanna speak about it
When you can not breathe you don't speak all that well
Its not that gross vest odor
Its Darth Vader and his forceful strangle spell
He wanna put me in a pop tart
Hey, that gonna make me annoyed
Sorry, Luke about your dad
A screw short of a droid

And that gooey going in my nose feels
Really gross

I can not move at all
Star war space opera is such a bore
I got an itchy aah
Feel the snot drip, I can't take any more
And when you're frozen in midsneeze
Inside a pastry shell that really blows
And the whines from my sinus scream
Solo, scratch your nose

And this hard frozen hand of Han
Can not scratch my nose

Yucky

At the getting of the stage sets
The set the roadies' staging
I smell basalmic dressing, uh huh
This show is just beginning, but

Steve brought the jar
Pickled artichoke hearts
So let's dip those hearts
In this mustard and sauce

You like your artichoke hearts, you like your hollendaise sauce
You turned my microphone on, you got my microphone yucky
You like your artichoke hearts, you like your hollendaise sauce
You like a dash of dijon, you got my microphone yucky
You got my microphone yucky, you got my microphone yucky
You got my microphone yucky, you got my microphone yucky

This show is just beginning
This mic is wet and sticky
What is this I'm feeling?
And this smells a little fishy, unh

Steve brought the carton of anchovy parts
So let's dip those parts in this mustard and sauce

You like your anchovy parts, you like your worcestershire sauce
You turned my microphone on, you got my microphone yucky
You like your anchovy parts, you like your worcestershire sauce
You like a spicy dijon, you got my microphone yucky
You got my microphone yucky, you got my microphone yucky
You got my microphone yucky, you got my microphone yucky

You got my microphone
You got my microphone
You got my microphone
You got my microphone
You got my microphone
You got my microphone
You got my microphone yucky
You got my microphone
You got my microphone yucky
You got my microphone yucky
You got my microphone yucky
You got my microphone yucky
You got my microphone yucky
You got my microphone yucky
You got my microphone yucky
You got my microphone yucky

Steve brought the jar
Pickled artichoke hearts
The mustard and sauce
And those anchovy parts

You like your artichoke hearts, you like your hollendaise sauce
You turned my microphone on, you got my microphone yucky
You like your anchovy parts, you like your worcestershire sauce
You like a spicy dijon, you got my microphone yucky
You got my microphone yucky, you got my microphone yucky
You got my microphone yucky, you got my microphone yucky
You got my microphone yucky, you got my microphone yucky
You got my microphone yucky, you got my microphone yucky

+2 Loaded Dungeon Dice of the Pirate Ninja Garden Gnome

He plays a pirate gnome
With ninja skills on the side
He guards his garden home
He's got loaded dungeon dice
He leads a ninja gnome crew
His stats are higher than high
He sure hits those good rolls
He got loaded dungeon dice

And he speeds through
With his wee crew
Gets the treasure but its wee too
And he throws his dicey rolls
Just like a snake who takes the gold dust
He poked the cyclops goddess in the saucer eye
He's got loaded dungeon dice

He gets to take the gold
He's got a moat to buy
He makes you give him more
He's got loaded dungeon dice
He'll make his die roll +2
Buddy, take my advice
And have him roll for you too
He's got loaded dungeon dice

And he goes through dungeon pros too
Hard to beat with his saving throw skew
And he throws his dicey rolls
Just out to make a dragon's nose gush
All the dwarves think he's a spy
He's got loaded dungeon dice

And he'll beat you
With his wee crew
All the better just to cheat you
And he throws his dicey rolls
Just nuff to make the tables go bust
He makes the dungeon master cry
He's got loaded dungeon dice

He'll beat you
With his wee crew
Just to cheat you
He's got loaded dungeon dice
He'll bulldoze you, when he throws two
And he goes through
He's got loaded dungeon dice

Undead Copurnicus (1545)

Ghoul, ghoul

Copurnicus had it all
He aced that astral call
Sun is up in space
And Earth revolves this way
He seemed to hit the score
Then he said something more
That Polo had a plan
Flat Earth a trading scam

He was gonna be a math wiz
He was gonna be a star
He was gonna shake his ass
Out of tune with Pope Paul's choir
But Polo was trainee in foul necromancy
He took to afterlife
And nothing has been alright

Albert Einstein, Bernoulli
Big brainy men those truly
There was Kepler, Galilei
Copurnicus's progeny
Now he is a night ghoul
And big brains make him fight drool
Since he was revivified
In fifteen, fifteen, fifteen forty five

Ghoul, fifteen forty five, ghoul

He eats astro-physics
He eats 'em every time
Bessel, Bode, Steven Hawking
Even that Sagan guy
He snacked out on LaGrange
And Anne Jump Cannon
Thought he'd get a hand
On Neil deGrasse Tyson

When Copurnicus ate Carl Sagen
Those yummy neurons numbered billion billion
When did astronomy become T.V.
What ever happened to sextants, nocturnals
In the grave you know were

Einstein, Bernoulli
Those brains were ghouly drool meat
There was Newton and Brahe
Copurnicus's progeny
Now he is a night ghoul
And big brains make him fight drool
Since he was revivified
In fifteen, fifteen, fifteen forty five

Ghoul
He hates time, make it stop
What did Apple do to make Siri talk?
And when did NASA get A.I. factor
Please make this
Stop! Stop! Stop!
And bring back

Einstein, Bernoulli
Those brains were kinda chewy
There was Herschel and Haley
Copurnicus's progeny
Now he is a night ghoul
And big brains make him fight drool
Since he was revivified
Fifteen forty five

That Einstein, Bernoulli
Those brains were ghouly drool meat
There was Hubble and Zwicky
Copurnicus's progeny
Now he is a night ghoul
And big brains make him fight drool
Since he was revivified
In fifteen, fifteen, fifteen forty five

The Curse of the Werechihuahua

I fight the urge to find a chewie
Oh, this strange time of the moon
Ever since chihuahua drooly
Bit my ankle in the gloom
My hairy wee time
Oh these forces
My hairy behind
Oh this curse
My hairy feet climb
Oh these nails click
And it makes me arf
And it makes me arf
And it makes me arf, arf arf arf, arf arf arf, arf arf arf arf arf arf
And it makes me arf, arf arf arf, arf arf arf, arf arf arf arf arf arf
Suppose I chewed a hole through my shoe
Suppose this paw won't fit a glove
Suppose you knew I'm way too small to
Jump up to reach that door knob
Suppose I chewed the telephone too
Suppose I couldn't even talk
Suppose I kept on waiting too long
Just to take a dog walk
Just to take a walk, arf arf arf, arf arf arf, arf arf arf arf arf arf
Just to take a walk, arf arf arf, arf arf arf, arf arf arf arf arf arf
Just to take a walk, arf arf arf, arf arf arf, arf arf arf arf arf arf
Take a walk
Take a walk
All my friends say
That the carpets
Gonna get wetter
Gonna get wetter
Wetter
Wetter
Wetter
Wetter
Wetter
Wetter
Wetter
I fight the urge to bite a chewie
Oh, this strange time of the moon
Ever since chihuahua drooly
Bit my ankle, sealed my doom
My hairy wee time
Oh this curse is
My hairy behind
And fleas hurt
My hairy feet climb
Oh these nails click
And it makes me arf
And it makes me arf
My hairy wee time
All of these curses
My hairy behind
All these fleas hurt
My hairy feet climb
All of these nails click
And it makes me arf
And it makes me arf
And it makes me arf, arf arf arf, arf arf arf, arf arf arf arf arf arf
And it makes me arf, arf, arf, arf, arf
And it makes me arf, arf arf arf, arf arf arf, arf arf arf arf arf arf
And it makes me arf
Makes me arf
And it makes me arf
And it makes me arf
And it makes me arf
And it makes me arf