Insomnia

Try to go to sleep

Tilt your head right

Scratch your chin

Stretch your leg again

Turn over

Close your eyes too, close your eyes too

Listen to the clock

Ticking on now

Check the time

Shadows on the wall, hum a song

Close your eyes too, close your eyes too

You just have insomnia

You just want to sleep the night away

You just have the hiccups, hiccup, hiccup, hiccup

You just have to breathe into a bag

Go on close your eye, eye, eye, eye-yi-eyes

Go on close your eye, eye, eye, eye-yi-eyes

Go on close your eye, eye, eye, eye-yi-eyes

So just close your eyes

Go on close your eyes

Snoo-oo-ooze

Restless leg syndrome

Wiggle feet

Mister Whiskers purrs

Does what kittys do

And those claws

They go right through, they go right through (Hey!)

Wait a second, I

Need to go… put the trash out too

Cause it's garbage day, today and

They will be here soon.  All too soon

You just have insomnia

You just want to sleep the night away

You just have the hiccups, hiccup, hiccup, hiccup

You just have to breathe into a bag

You just have insomnia

You just want to sleep the night away

You just have the hiccups, hiccup, hiccup, hiccup

You just have to breathe into a bag

Go on close your eye, eye, eye, eye-yi-eyes

Go on close your eye, eye, eye, eye-yi-eyes

Go on close your eye, eye, eye, eye-yi-eyes

Go on close your eyes

Go on close your eye, eye, eye, eye-yi-eyes

Go on close your eye, eye, eye, eye-yi-eyes

Go on close your eye, eye, eye, eye-yi-eyes

So just close your eyes

Go on close your eyes

You just have insomnia

You just want to sleep the night away

You just have the hiccups, hiccup, hiccup, hiccup

You just have to breathe into a bag

Go on close your eye, eye, eye, eye-yi-eyes

Go on close your eye, eye, eye, eye-yi-eyes

Go on close your eye, eye, eye, eye-yi-eyes

Go on close your eyes

Mister Whiskers, please

Hey off my face

Take a breath

Scratch those kitty ears, hear the purrs

Close your eyes too

Close those eyes too

Potato Surprise

Got some left-overs

Some o-old french fri-ies

Clean the 'frigerator

It's casserole night

Toss in the tuna

Trim off the cheese

Add in some of those obligitory peas

It needs some of these, these leftover peas

Mix it under, under, under

Leftover spam, it's a cellophane prize

Squirt in some ketchup, add a quarter pot pie

Some rubbery broccoli, and dry carrot sticks

Mix it under some soy bacon bits

Mmmm bacon bits

Potato surprise, potato surprise

Mixing up some leftover

Potato surprise

Potato surprise, potato surprise

Fixing up a casserole called

Potato surprise, oh woah oh oh

Let's reminisce

With that old crusty rice

Half a frankfurter, that frankfurter's nice

And back in that corner, say what's in that bowl

It looks kinda grody and so old I can't tell

What it i-i-is

What is this foo-ooo-ood

It's in potato surpri-i-ise

Yeah potato surpri-ise

Potato surprise, potato surprise

Everything ends up inside

Potato surprise

Potato surprise, potato surprise

It all ends up somewhere in

Potato surprise

Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na

Some mushy zucchini, from Saturday night

Got the runs then, but lets give it a try

Pop in some pudding, I hope that it's lime

Eat this stuff now or we'll have it next time

Potato surprise, potato surprise

Mixing up some leftover

Potato surprise

Potato surprise, potato surprise

Fixing up a casserole called

Potato surprise

Potato surprise, potato surprise

Everything ends up inside

Potato surprise

Potato surprise, potato surprise

It all ends up somewhere in

Potato surpri-i-ise, oh-woah-oh

Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na

Potato surprise

Yeah yeah yeah

Potato surprise

Yeah yeah yeah

Carry Buddha

So, the master monk said

To that room instead

Feng shui

We have to move Buddha today

And son of a gun

But he's a heavy one

Got qualms, and sweaty palms

So though Buddha should enlighten me

I bet he's gonna squish my chi

And now he's ow, ow, ow, ow, on my toe you see

Now why don't you

Carry Buddha?

Oh-oh-oh

Hands on his knees

Keep moving please

Oh please

This may just herniate me

Oh no

My right, not yours

Through those big doors

Turn there

Then up the stairs

So though I took a vow I would not speak

This redecoration situation's bleak

And now my back, back, back, back, back is tweaked

Ow, carry Buddha

Oh, ow

Tell me, tell you

This thing is heavy

Bent brows broke vows

Spoken a few

I got a few for you too

Up one flight, and then the next

To the alcove that's the best

That Buddha's solid brass

Don't wanna bust my…. back

So though I took a vow I would not speak

This redecoration situation's bleak

And now my back, back, back, back, back is tweaked

Ow, carry, carry Buddha

Pastrami on a Parmesan Bun

I'm in love, with the deli girl

But I can't say the words

So I just buy more sandwiches

And it's giving me the stinky burps

I'm eating there three times a day

Hoping it's your shift

Getting stamps on my sandwich card

When you're off I feel like I've been gypped

You take pastrami

And put it on a parmesan bun

And you made it so tasty

Now I want another one

How the weeks and the seasons turn

And that sandwich is our thing

I wish that I could speak some other words

Instead I'll have another pastrami

And you take pastrami

Put it on that parmesan bun

And you made it so tasty

Now I want another one

Change of hands at the Sandwich Land

Now saeurkraut makes me cry

Cuz you've gone to the Deli Grand

And I will not have my Reuben on rye

You gotta take pastrami

And put it on that parmesan bun

Cuz that makes it so tasty

Now I want another one

You take pastrami

And put it on a parmesan bun

But you made it so God darn tasty

Now I want another one

Now I want another one

Now I want another one

And I go

And I go

And I go

And I go

And I go

And I go, so

Now I want another one

lol brb

You order delivery?

Mmm mmm mmmm.  Mmm mmm mmmm.  Mmm mmm mm mm mm.

I'm gonna need some of that chow mein

I'm gonna need some battered meat

I'm gonna need some of that egg fu young

I'm gonna need a cookie too

I'm gonna celebrate an egg roll

I'll be chowing broccoli beef

I'm gonna swallow me some of that sweet moo shu, and nobody's gonna keep it from me

LOL

BRB

One more plate

That's what I need

LOL

I said OMG

I'm gonna eat my plate clean

Now been seventeen minutes, since my fork went down

Seventeen more, I'll starve, you'll see

These Asian noodles just won't fill me up

But I need some more of that MSG

LOL

BRB

One more plate

That's what I need

LOL

I said OMG

I'm gonna eat my plate clean

My belly's growling, my mouth is drooling, microwave is calling to me

My belly's growling, my mouth is drooling, microwave is calling to me

My belly's growling, my mouth is drooling, microwave is calling to me

My belly's growling, my mouth is drooling, microwave is calling to me

LOL

BRB

One more plate

That's what I need

LOL

I said OMG

I'm gonna eat my plate clean

LOL

BRB

One more plate

That's what I need

LOL

I said OMG

I'm gonna eat my plate clean

Do You Like Your Shoes?

Do you like your shoes?

Do you like your shoes, Buddy?

I'm a foot artist Mister, so tell me true

I'm asking you Buster

Do you li-i-ike your shoes?

I'm fine, at the shoe store

I'm not baking anymore

I've left that tree

That cookie dough

Now I got me

My shoe chateau

Suede feet, I'll make it, make it

Suede feet, I'll make it, make it

Do you like your shoes?

Do you like your shoes, Buddy?

Elves don't do buckles, that fad has flew

I'm asking you Buster

Do you li-i-ike your shoes?

Don't make toys, for hairy geezer

That hammer noise,  s'not a pleaser

The North Pole is cold

Elf lips ain't blue

Yeah I got my goals

Now I'm making shoes

Suede feet, I'll make it, make it

Suede feet, I'll make it, make it

Do you like your shoes?

Do you like your shoes, Buddy?

I'm a foot artist Mister, so tell me true

I'm asking you Buster

Do you li-i-ike your shoes?

Do you like your shoes?

Do you like your shoes, Buddy?

Elves don't do velcro, that fad has flew

I'm asking you Buster

Do you li-i-ike your shoes?

I'm fine, at the shoe store

Don't hang with hobbits anymore

Go fight your dragon

Your Tolkien war

I'm making sandals

Got orders out the door

Suede feet, I'll make it, make it

Suede feet, I'll make it, make it

Do you like your shoes?

Frogs Don't Wear Pajammies

Oh, frogs don't wear pajammies in the morning,

Morning jammies aren't their cup of tea,

The waistband's far too wide,

and the legs are far too long,

Jammies just don't fit their fannies properly.

Oh, frogs don't wear pajammies in the daytime,

That flannel's hot and itchy in the sun,

And when they hop and jump

on their lily pads and stumps,

Pajammies really aren't a lot of fun.

Oh, frogs don't wear pajammies in the morning,

In that way they are not like you and me,

And even in the night time,

when they have to pee,

Frogs don't wear pajammies don't you see!

Frogs don't wear pajammies on the schoolbus,

All the kids would laugh and point and stare,

            Not even for a million flies!

A frog wouldn't wear pajammies over there.

And when they're swimming in the pond,

Pajammies wouldn't last for long,

They'd get wet and limp and soggy,

Oh that poor pajammied froggy!

That's why frogs wear bathing suits.